Just when you thought the pregnancy was over, the work begins. No-one tells you about the work to come, when bubs is kicking and gurgling in your lovely tum-tum.
For many mums – pregnancy is glorious. The days spent on the couch, feeling a little kick will never be back once bubs is out. These mums walk happily in the schoolyard. They rub their beautiful round bellies, dreaming about having even more bambinos.
For other mums – it’s a hell nine months. For many, morning sickness is robbery. Then the giving up of wine, cheese, coffee and seafood feels like a major life sentence. Some mothers fret over the loss of their beautiful pre-baby body. They start investing in stretchmark lotions or any cream that can bring them back.
Others huff-and-puff in cars, rolling their eyes at people through the rearview mirror. They’re the new designated driver – to all friends and family in the neighbourhood. They get invited to sooooo many parties now. It’s weird. If they’re not driving, they’re the women, sitting on stools at parties in the kitchen. They’re avoiding drunk people. So they’re in the kitchen washing dish after dish and checking the clock. They’re desperate for the night to end.
Remember all those women who smiled and peered at your preggy belly at the supermarket?
It’s not until years down the track you do that yourself – as the experienced mum you’ve become.
It’s likely you are thinking:
Poor woman – she has no idea what she’s in for.
You realise all those beautiful smiles from other mums, didn’t mean what you thought they did. They may not have been the well-intentioned looks you thought they were.
Sure. Some looks were warm and fuzzy. Those were from Earth mothers who can’t get enough of kids. But the rest of those glances? Those mums looks were pleading. The rest of those mums felt sorry for you.
They knew this:
You were about to gain a beautiful amazing adorable kid. Yes, an absolute fact. But, a new life of dishes, washing, chores, and damn hard work was about to swallow you up in a vacuum of domestic chaos.
I’m that second mum.
There’s alot of work involved in getting to what I call ‘blissville.’ Blissville is the ten or so minutes in a mum’s day. That part of the day you get paid – in cuddles. Worth it yes. But most days, you feel you deserve a promotion.
More cuddles, less work and a kitchen with a view of the ocean.
It’s a fact that, despite all the amazing help dads are giving out, mums are still overworked. Mums still do the bulk of work as chefs, taxi drivers, home administrators, cleaners and more.
Here’s a quick list I’ve put together of a few hats mum wear daily:
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House CEO
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Chef
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Cleaner
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Taxi Driver
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Judge
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Hairdresser
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Police Woman
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Family Therapist
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Courier
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Laundry Worker
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Teacher
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Accountant
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Personal Assistant
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Art Curator
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Gardener
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Nurse
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Detective
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Lifeguard
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Daycare Worker
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Kid Stylist
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Personal Shopper
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Events Coordinator
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Cheerleader
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Sleep Therapist
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Story Teller
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Motivational Speaker
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Safety Officer
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Singer
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Tour Guide
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Taxi Driver
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Psychologist
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Mediator
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Tailor
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Interior Designer
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Bodyguard
There’s no doubt about this. As a Mum you put your life on the line for your kids. If you’ve ever woken to the beaming smile of a child jumping on you, you’ll know the day has begun – and not by your making.
My morning starts with a walk to the kitchen down a long hallway. I’ll pick up toys, towels and teddies on my way to the kettle. Coffee is next – because nothing happens without coffee. Shortly after that, it’s a shower, lunches, lost bags, notes, signatures and a fight for a park at the schoolyard. And that’s the abridged version of my typical morning.
Whatever your day holds, if you are a mum, you’ll know there’s isn’t a lot of slack left in the day for you.
Remember the old ‘you’ mum?
That woman who…
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Who once did hair and makeup daily?
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Who owned some things that nobody else touched?
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Who could take a piss without people freaking out you left?
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Who could get through a day without answering 50+ questions?
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Who didn’t have to know where everything was at all times?
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Who could live in a house without being hunted up a hallway?
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Who could watch a TV show without lip reading?
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Who could go for a drive that wasn’t a drop-off, pick-up or grocery run?
I could go on – but I know you don’t have the time to read a list this long.
Despite the above, so many mothers still feel they aren’t doing enough. They’re burdened with guilt. They feel they could always do more. Such as read or play more with their kids. They could get more involved with their school work. They could volunteer more often at working bees. They could inspire their kids more.
There’s yet another list that could go on and on and on….
So if you still feel guilty about not doing enough, here’s something to ponder:
They went on a mission to find out how much housework mums are doing on a weekly basis.
Here’s what they unveiled:
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54.2% mums are spending a whopping 8-24 hours on housework every week.
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39.3% mums have a home with more than four bedrooms
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34.8% mums put off oven cleaning as their least favourite household chore.
In short, mums wish that they could do more. They feel there isn’t enough time in the day to keep a perfectly clean home. They struggle to balance housework with spending quality fun time with the family.
And here’s what I have to say about this:
In life, we work with:
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The best of what we have
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Using the resources at our disposal
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Based on the life experiences we have had
To all well-meaning beautiful mums out there:
Lose the guilt.
Promote yourself.
Work less.
Stop for more cuddles.
Sit by the ocean.
Life is short.
Enjoy the moment.
Here’s a way you can skip housework altogether!
Thanks to the awesome world we all now live in, outsourcing tough cleaning jobs is a real solution for mums.
Here are some even more awesome stats from the Oneflare survey:
51.4% mums said “heck yes!” to wishing to hire a reasonably priced cleaners ($33/per hour).
Do it with this discount:
Outsource your cleaning and spend more time with your loved ones. Click here to get 50% on your first clean if you book with Oneflare Now.
